In 2003, my best friend got married and I was her bridesmaid, alongside her sister.

It was a brilliant day – one of those weddings that stays with you.

Afterwards, I packed the dress into a bag with the shoes I’d worn, and it went into my parents’ loft.

It then moved from loft to loft until I settled in Edinburgh 14 years ago. It went into a cupboard, alongside all the other sentimental things. And it stayed there, completely untouched, until last year.

That cupboard was in what I used to affectionately call our room of doom. The spare bedroom, the office and the home of anything I didn’t quite know what to do with.

I found the dress in a bag, exactly where I’d left it, and thought: why am I still holding onto this?

I liked it at the time. But it was never my colour (it was chosen for the wedding, as bridesmaid dresses are) and, twenty-two years on, it didn’t fit. Even if it did, it’s not something I’d wear. It was just never going on again.

So I ran a poll on Instagram: will my best friend be offended if I let go of the bridesmaid dress I wore to her wedding 20+ years ago? It became my most popular poll ever.

Only 4% said, ‘Yes, you have to keep it,’ while 8% voted, ‘Yes, but that’s no reason to keep it.’ The other 88%? They went for, ‘No! She won’t care.’ And they were right, as my best friend confirmed when I tagged her.

But regardless of what she said, I’d already made up my mind.

There was no good reason to keep it. She came back saying she wouldn’t be offended, and the dress went to a charity shop.

The thing about sentimental items

There’s a definite guilt that comes with things like this. It’s not about cost (the dress didn’t cost me anything). It’s about what it represents. A friendship, a day and a version of yourself from a long time ago.

Letting go of something sentimental can feel like you’re letting go of the memory itself.

But you’re not. Memories aren’t held in objects – they’re in you.

An object might trigger a recollection, but your experiences and emotions are what hold it. I don’t need the dress to remember what a beautiful day it was.

Keeping something you no longer need or want, just because of what it once meant, doesn’t honour the memory. It just takes up space, in your cupboard and in your head.

If you’re holding onto something similar

You don’t have to keep it out of obligation. The memory is already yours. The object is just taking up room.

If you want a physical reminder, take a photograph. But if it’s been in a bag in a cupboard for years and you’ve barely thought about it, that tells you something too.

If sentimental clutter is the thing standing between you and a home that actually feels like yours, I’d love to help. Get in touch and we’ll work through it together.